Thank you for having me. I walk around angry, jaded and bitter. I am not religious but I have begged bargained and negotiated with any higher power. I am a parent, I am Kassi’s mom. I am hoping Kassi will be able to write her own successful story when she is healthy enough. For now I will write it for her.
She is 25, youngest daughter of 4. At 13 she was diagnosed with Hashimotos Thyroid disease, along with that came some depression and anxiety. In came psychiatry. A slew of medications and many hospital stays. Fast forward she is 18, an adult. My husband and I have no control, now she is diagnosed with bi-polar, BPD, major depressive disorder. She is an adult drugged up on concoctions that arent working on each admission. Tied down, injected, isolated for days. A new psychiatrist each time. 21 admissions in hospitals, some lengthy stays, some shorter stays. Days of no contact with her because she is too drugged up to talk, but they say “at least she is safe”.
Fast forward to August of this year. She wanted off the antipsychotics but we only had the help of our family doctor. He was on our side, he hated what they were doing to her, but he also had no control. He helped us convert to liquid. It went well for a month and then we believe the taper was too fast. Back in the hospital. New psychiatrist, another injection, another isolation room. The psychiatrist was mad we were tapering. We strongly disagreed and said, “no, its the drugs she is tapering off and we went too fast”. Psychiatrist said, “your daughter is schizophrenic and we are going to give her a monthly injection”. Kassi came home after a month, so drugged up on the injection she couldn’t hold a thought or finish a sentence. Back in she went. The worst decision we made. The psychiatrist agreed “she’s not doing well but its not the antipsychotic, it’s her”. She said, “we will switch things up and use something different”, (I won’t name the drug), we then have no choice, if this doesn’t work we will do electric brain shock”.
We went into panic mode. We knew the tapering was working but we went too fast. We asked ourselves, ‘why is there no place for people to go to taper slowly in a safe environment’? We made many phone calls but because Kassi didn’t have a history of alcohol or drug abuse there was no place for her just to support her taper. Fast forward to today. We did find Kassi a place in the states the only place we could find. Thousands and thousands of dollars to taper her off. My husband and I would live in a cardboard box under a bridge if we can help her so that’s what we did. We don’t care about our retirement we needed to help her and try to undo the years of damage they have done.
We know she won’t be fully tapered off as our money will run out so we will bring her home in a couple of months, continue the taper, and not let the psychiatrist know she is back. We are scared, we are from B.C., the only province in Canada where you have no rights. Her psychiatrist told us the day she was discharged “I wont get in your way but she will be mentally certified when she arrives back”. We will try everything we can to continue the slow taper, get her healthy, and able to tell her story.
Lorrie, Kassi’s mom